I never check it. There’s a good reason for it though.
It’s because I don’t know how.
Yeah! I’m serious!
You know for some reason, I developed this reputation as this tech whiz and guru of computers? That was a total mistake. I should’ve invested my time into something more useful like cooking. A man’s gotta eat. I’m getting a little weary of Michelina’s too. I never learned how to check my voice mail. The most technical thing I know how to do on my phone is transfer ringtones like Journey and Rocky and set alarms for obscene hours in the morning. I even made my friend change the wallpaper on my phone because I had no idea how. It’s a picture of lillies or lilacs or whatever flowers that are white. I don’t even have a clue how to change it so I’m stuck staring at flowers every time I open my phone.
So from now on, here’s the goddamn procedure if you wanna get a hold of me. Go ahead and call. If I don’t answer and it goes to my voice mail, don’t even bother leaving a message. I’m never going to check it.
Of course, there might be cases where I’m otherwise preoccupied. I could be in lecture. I could be asleep. Or more than likely, I’m deeply engaged in an enlightening conversation with a most captivating woman who demands my complete attention.
Let’s put it this way.
If you really want to talk to me, keep calling. If I really want to talk to you, I’ll answer.