A friend of mine told me to give the whole online dating thing a try. How’s it been so far? Pretty much non-existent. I browse through the matches and I get all sorts of women who I just don’t feel interested in. Are my standards too high? I don’t think so. Maybe there’s just not enough information.
Then again, I doubt I’m going to click with anyone who’s into hardcore fitness stuff.
Do veggies constitute 95% of your diet? Sorry, you’re probably going to hate me.
Into heavy metal or rap? Not my thing either.
I don’t think I’ve come across anyone’s profile where gaming is even once remotely mentioned. There’s supposed to be lots of girl gamers out there right? Maybe I’m just not looking in all the right places.
Or maybe I’m going at it the wrong way. Here’s what I can do for you:
Sacrifice: I’m the guy that will pull the pin out of the grenade and attract as many zombies to my location just so you can make it out to the helicopter and get out alive.
Ideally, you’d be just as cutthroat to the point where such an act wouldn’t have to be required.
Loyalty: I’ll be right behind you at all times ready to shield you. I’ll back you up if you get caught off guard without a weapon. If you’re reloading, I’m blasting away and buying time for you to stock up.
Ideally, you wouldn’t get caught off guard without a weapon.
Anticipation: Look, I’m probably not going to be able to understand and read your mind, but I think I can reasonably anticipate what your next move might be and take action to complement that. If you zig, I’ll zag. If you freeze a bunch of bad guys in place, I’ll have a massive fireball queued up to roast them alive.
Ideally, you make it blatantly obvious what your next move is.
Together, we could be a force to be reckoned with.
Realistically, it doesn’t even have to be a relationship. I’m just looking for a girl with similar interests. I don’t want to be 9th wheel anymore. You can sing the vocals to Paramore – Misery Business in Guitar Hero so that I don’t have to. Be my partner and help me outwit my friends in Taboo. We can share our favourite MLIA stories. You don’t have to be a hardcore gamer or anything. Look, I lost my best friend years ago (we haven’t spoken to each other since and we never will). I won’t deny it’s had a negative effect but it’s time for me to jump start and move on. We can hang out for coffee or tea and come up with defensive plans against zombie attacks or something.
It’s a big city. Might you know a girl who fits the shoe? I’m always open to meeting new people.
Come on, new best friend. I know you’re out there somewhere. I just haven’t found you yet.