In my first year out of high school, I didn’t have a clue about what I wanted to do. Central had counsellors and programs to help people figure out what you wanted to do. But were they effective? No, not really. During grade 9 and 10, I thought for sure I was going into a career being surrounded by computers, gadgets, gizmos, and other tech. By the time I hit grade 12, everyone was convinced that I would end up in the information technology industry.

It Was Not To Be

Sometimes, all it takes is one class to completely derail your future. Ever since I took that fated distance education course on Java and programming, I knew that this was not an avenue that I wanted to pursue. It gave me a glimpse on what future University courses were like that involved programming. And they all involved math. Matt is not a mathematics man.

It was too late for me to change my SFU application faculties. When I signed up early, it was under the computing science or science faculties. Naturally, I was rejected from SFU. Talk about stupid mistakes. No one told me I could apply to SFU general as a fail safe. My parents didn’t know much. The friends I had were in the same boat as I was and had no clue either. Off I went to Kwantlen in my first year.

The first week I was there, I swallowed my pride and spoke to a counselor. Half my friends will tell you I’m stubborn. The other half are too nice and will say that I’m firm.

Mistake 1

I had to decide on a specific set of subjects. Specifically, I had to think about what I wanted to do as a career. What the hell, I thought. I decided I’d take a shot at business. All my friends were doing it and I did not want to get left behind either. I tried an accounting course and an economics course to get my feet wet.

At the end of the semester, I did an average job on the grades. More importantly I wasn’t happy. That’s when it hit me like Chris Pronger on Kesler after a goal. It dawned on me that I was going about school all wrong. My parents wanted me to go into business. My friends also encouraged me to go into business. Everyone saw a lot of opportunities in it for me. Yet I didn’t really care about functions, aggregates, supply, demand or any of that stuff. If you don’t care about what it is that you’re studying, you will never do well in life. Thankfully, it only took me a semester before I realized what I was doing wrong. I was taking business courses for all the wrong reasons. I was doing things that other people wanted me to do and that didn’t fly at all. It’s my life, I only have one shot at it, and I’m going to do things my way.

Redemption

In the spring semester, a dear friend of mine recommended me to try a Criminology course with him. On a side note, I encourage all of you to try this. The next time a friend asks you to try something, don’t ask why.

Ask why not?

I took courses: a History class and that Criminology class. I had not yet decided what I really wanted to do and I didn’t want to spend unnecessary amounts of money. Right away, there were some subtle changes that happened:

• I actually read the textbook
• Looked up crime stories on the web
• Actively participated in discussion
• Putting in a ton of effort
• Did not skip any classes
• More importantly, I was interested in what I was learning about

There are people I know right now who are in school being miserable because they hate what they’re doing. They’re learning what they don’t care about because it’s what others want them to do, not what they themselves want to do. I don’t believe in that. I’m not talking about breadth requirement courses. I have to take STATS and I hate it, but it’s a requirement. I’m talking about people going into majors and minors into subjects that they’re better off not being in. It’s a waste of money on courses. More importantly, it’s a waste of time.

The Bottom Line

If I could finalize everything in this post to one line, it’s to choose your own path in life. I don’t believe in fate or predetermined futures. To that end, don’t let others dictate or tell you what to do. If you want to be an engineer, go build bridges. If you want to be in the military, go blow them up. If you want to make money, be a stock broker or a businessman. You’re not 5 years old anymore. You’re old enough to make decisions and it’s time you did.

Me? I want to practice law (or enforce it).

How do you know your purpose in life?

Simple answer: You don’t! It’s a gut feeling that can happen like a premonition or it could take time to cultivate. You don’t have to follow in the footsteps of your parents or your friends. I tried my hand at business and had no business being in it. Don’t expect to keep up with high school friends in University. It’s impossible. I’m lucky if I even see them once a month. Your life is yours to live and it may as well be satisfying.

As I write this, I’m taking a break from finishing off my term paper. Isn’t that ironic? Taking a break from writing by… writing? But I want to maintain a rate of a post a day. Not to mention the fact that my brain is quite fried.

Throughout life, there will be doors that open in front and doors that close behind. Sometimes you step through them without realizing it. Other times you may look and miss it. Recognizing opportunity is an important life skill regardless of what trade you’re in.

The Story

Let me tell you a story that happened today.

I was heading home on the way from school. After showing the bus driver my fare, I promptly sat down near the back of the bus. To my surprise, a classmate of mine was also on that same bus. She is in my CRIM 104 tutorial and I couldn’t remember her name. We exchanged pleasantries but I decided to get up and sit next to her so we could talk comfortably.We started talking a bit more and I discovered that she was in her first year at SFU. No, she wasn’t majoring in Criminology but was considering minoring in it. Yes, she started on her term paper but encountered some difficulty with it because she has never written a paper like this before (further affirming my believe in this blog and what I’m trying to do). She said kind words about the presentation I gave two months ago and even remembered the questions that I asked the class for discussionary purposes.

At this point, transit cops showed up. Today was the first time I’ve ever seen them board a bus and checking fares. I usually see them on the sky train. My friend started to panic. She misplaced her U-Pass and it was still being mailed to her. She thought her student ID would be enough to hold up, and I assume the bus driver let her through. But I know the transit police would not be as kind. Turns out all she had to do was purchase a fare ticket. But she didn’t have any change! I checked my wallet, and all I had was 75 cents. Not enough to cover the rising costs of Translink. Curse me for not bringing enough change! At this point, I was already several stops past my bus stop and she decided to step off and call for a ride home rather than deal with the hassles of Translink.

But she didn’t have her phone with her!

Being the tech savvy geek I am, I offered her the use of my phone which she gladly accepted. Success! Parents on the way! We talked a bit more about school before we parted ways.

I took ten steps before I realized that I lost out on a key opportunity here. I missed out on a chance to partner up with a study buddy. I missed out on a chance to get to know someone. I missed out on a chance to offer direction in school where it can often be a scary place for first years. I missed out on a chance to explore a new friendship or a relationship even, but I know I’m not ready for that yet.

Sigh

So now you see. Here I had a classmate from school. I don’t have any idea what her name is and I completely missed a potential opportunity. With this week being the last day of classes and tutorials, it is very likely that I will never see her again. I failed to recognize this opportunity and capitalize on it.

But it’s not over yet…

You see, when she made the call on my phone, she didn’t wipe her number from my dialed calls list…

Remember, as one door closes another opens up. It’s up to you to walk through it.